My Perfect Man (as of today)

So lately I've been getting a lot of backfire from guys because I said I made a list of what I want my perfect guy to be like in order for me to date again. I guess because I didn't make the list visible they make think its some outrageous stuff on there when its mostly personality traits so I decided I would post the list for all to see.

·         Brave

·         Enthusiastic

·         Willing to defend me and have my back

·         Very romantic

·         Hygienic

·         Very clean cut

·         Prep boy swag

·         Likes to dance/party/socialize

·         Not a smoker

·         Drinks but rarely (special occasions only)

·         Driven

·         Has high self-esteem (not conceited)

·         Knows what he wants out of life and has a plan on how to get there

·         Dark chocolate man with a beautiful smile

·         heterosexual

·         Close to where I live or willing to move closer

·         Supportive

·         Family-oriented

·         Willing to compromise

·         Lean in body muscle (not skinny)

·         Passionate love-maker who likes to get a little rough

·         Spiritual (not religious)

·         Responsible

·         Can manage/budget money well

·         Doesn’t get super irritated when work gets busy

·         Can communicate well with me about how he’s feeling

·         Very open and honest and considerate about feelings when being honest

·         Willing to do community service/give back to society

·         Likes to go out but mostly likes to chill and cuddle while watching a movie

·         Will believe that our relationship is an equal partnership

·         Nice lips

·         Facial hair (not a lot though)

·         Creative

·         Influential

·         Motivated

·         Mature

·         Willing to make an adequate amount of time for me

·         Affectionate

·         Strong upper body (nice arm muscles)

·         Fit (doesn’t have a gut)

·         Nice teeth

·         Kind of tall

·         Adventurous/Daring

·         Open-minded

·         Willing to expand his knowledge

·         Playful

·         Great sense of humor

·         Very understanding and able to admit when he’s in the wrong/humble

·         Strong, masculine presence

·         Sensual/Sexy

·         Big, bright eyes that show the depths of his soul (long eyelashes)

·         Jet black hair

·         Not needy/ Independent

·         Works hard on self-growth and forgiveness

     So there it is ladies and gents! Nothing to be worried about and nothing that isn't achievable.

Let's Not Play the Blame Game

So I am currently going through a growing experience. I decided that I would be celibate for at least 100 days (which at this stage in my life it may last way longer than that but I said 100 days as a start) and during that time to do a lot of self reflection and try to grow as much as possible mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. So along the way I have been having a lot of epiphanies and well last night and this morning I had another one.

That epiphany was that I do not owe anybody anything. I say that because I am generally a very nice person and a generous friend and I feel like many people take that for granted. I am not going to bend over backwards to be on someone's good side, to help them feel better about a situation, or take care of them emotionally or physically. If u want my help or advice then say so but do not expect for me to go all out my way because in all actuality to be worried about others so much is draining me from properly taking care of myself which is detrimental to my character. People don't understand that the more I work on being the best me I can be, the better I can help you be the best you that you can be. I don't jump on pity parties, I show solutions and if I know you're not ready to hear that then I give you your space. I just don't like it when people try to make me the enemy because I'm leaving them to be responsible to fight their own battles without draining my own energy! I just want people to know that I will be there when you're in need, but when I cannot offer you the help that you want, I fade to the background until you are ready, but I do not wait around for people to be ready because in all honesty if you do not continue to grow I will still continue to do so without you. But whenever you decide that you want to grow with me as my friend, significant other, family, business partner or whatever, then I will gladly reach back and pull you forward, but only if you ask it of me. I will not struggle to bring you up to speed and THAT'S REAL!

New Perspectives

Over the last few months, I've been telling myself that I was going to consciously change the way I live my life, and while evaluating my life from day-to-day I felt like I wasn't changing much, but life has shown me that I am completely wrong.

See a little over a year ago, I had my first gut wrenching break-up with the only boyfriend I ever had. And while I looked fine on the outside, I have to say it took a great toll on the past year. A year later feeling recovered but not yet willing to date, I realized in all honesty there was a reason to that.....I wasn't really recovered. My life was still in the process of getting back to me, and when I say that I do not mean an OLD me I mean a GROUNDED me. Over the past year in trying to do so I went natural (like I cut my hair off and am waiting for it to grow back chemical free), spent more time with family and friends, etc. But I still felt like something was missing. Now I've always considered myself spiritual but I could never "get down" with religion. We just never seem to get along quite well, but I've realized over the years that even though I can't stand religion, I love love love to learn about different ones and of course my favorites are Christianity and Wicca. But recently Christianity has been in the forefront, and that is probably because in the past few months I read two awesome books by Kathleen McGowan called the Expected One and the Book of Love, and I also read this awesome web series called Heaven's Descenders at www.godfire.net. Well anyways getting to my point I've done a lot of conscious changes in my everyday life. Trying to show more love to others, letting things go, meditating more, and all kinds of other things. Well like I said before, I kept feeling like nothing was changing until this Thursday the most amazing thing happened. And I know you could never guess so let me tell you what that was.

I WAS ROBBED! I know, I know, not the first thing you think of when you think of amazing but hear me out.

I was at a friends apartment, had been there all day and that night she invited friends over. I spent the night over there to watch another friend who was too drunk to function and when we decided to leave the next day, I realized my bag with my wallet and keys in them were gone. At first the whole thing felt surreal so that for the most part I was just irritated that I had been in my swimsuit for 24 hours and now couldn't get back in to my place to change, and that I was hungry and had no money to get food. Later it dawned on me that when they change the locks this will probably cost me $250 and I have to pay for the lockout, pay for a new school I.D. and state, and new debit cards and the such. I knew I would be looking to pay like a total of $400, and being a college student with no job I didn't know what to think, until I just didn't think. I stopped reacting, and my friends bought me food. I got dressed and went to an alpha party and had fun, and the whole next day all I did was watch movies, listen to feel good music, and pray. And my prayers were not frantic like "Oh God please help me I just don't know what to do, how could something like this happen to me." My prayer's were more like "God I am putting my faith in you to help me correct this. I will not worry about the money because I know it can be replaced. I live by the Lord's prayer and the fourth petal of it says 'and give us this day, our daily bread the manna' which means you will always provide for me. and I know that everything happens for a reason so I look forward to looking back to see what the reason was." And after every time I said that prayer, I played more music and danced and sang, and felt no stress or worry. It hit me then that all my hard work was paying off, and for once I was living from a grounded state. I'm not saying the process of getting back to me is over, but it sure feels good to know that I am so very close to achieving it, and with that I woke up this morning with a whole new perspective on life, and I have to say I can't help but smile.

Hopefully this post will help you if you read this to let go of the little things and always appreciate the good in life, and that whatever you do, have faith.

Hello World

Hello world! My name is TyRonda and this will be my first blog post.

I have actually been thinking about creating a blog for a while now and was actually encouraged by many friends to do so so here I am. Now I feel that I should warn my readers first that I am very free thinking, can be very blunt, have many opinions about very diverse things, and some of them may actually at some point rub you the wrong way and I am very sorry for that. But for right now you will get to see a very warm side of me.

To start off, I named this blog Fiery Living and Loving as a way to show that I am very passionate about the things I take interest in and the way I plan to live my life. I am also very passionate about love and I believe that it is what makes the world goes round. Now when I say love I do not just mean the relationship cakish kind because in all honesty P.D.A. (public displays of affection) rubs me the wrong way. When I say love I mean love for life and everything else on this God green earth. I try to show love in so many ways that one day I plan to become a Naturopathic physician so that I can show people a more healthier and holistic way to tend to their bodies, which will stem from the heart, and to be a part time couple's and sex therapist so that one day our society can have healthier relationships and the divorce rate will no longer be over 50%. These are my goals and I will stick with them. Now that you know a little about me feel free to comment so that I may know a little about you. I like to get to know people and brighten others day. Don't worry, I don't bite lol.